Transistions

So if you read last nights post, you would see that I am currently in a transitional period. Transitional in many senses. Transitional in my career, transitional in my location, transitional in my life.

Part of this transition is not fun at all. I am separated from my family. I am currently living in a 2 bedroom apartment by myself in Tulsa, OK while my family is still in Iowa. I have been driving back and forth on weekends (I call it my commute) but I can't keep that up forever. In fact, last weekend was the first time I did not head back to Iowa. I had hurt my back the previous weekend and did not think that 14 hours of driving in 3 days would do me any favors. Besides, muscle relaxants, being tired and driving are not the greatest mix.

So, I spent the weekend driving around Tulsa, checking out some of the neighborhoods and just getting a feel for the city. Housing is abundant, so finding a house wont be a problem. But, I cant really begin to look until we have someone to buy our current home in Iowa.

Therein lies the rub. I feel like I am stuck in this no mans land of family, career and relocation. I will not bring my family to Tulsa until we can buy a house here. We cant buy a house here until we sell the one there. The reason I wont bring the family down here is that we would have to rent an apartment or home until we could sell the current one (cant afford two mortgages) and I wont make my son start school here, and then change neighborhoods when we can buy a home. It would be like moving him twice and I wont do it.

So here I sit. Lonely, missing my family and friends back home. I miss talking to my son about his day at school or his newest revelation about Star Wars (never thought I would miss that). I am going to miss the start of the Cub Scout year, sign up night is tonight. (I guess I should have mentioned that I was the Cubmaster for our pack. I have helped the new leadership team with ideas on getting the year off to a great start, and they have run with it and made it their own.) But mostly, I miss spending time with my wife. Phone calls don't do it for me. We are always distracted by the things going on around us and never have any meaningful conversations. Right now it just seems like we are living two separate lives, which we are.

As for the new job, things are going well. Although, I still feel like I am not accomplishing much, but my leader is happy with my progress. I have jumped in and taken on some smaller projects as way to build up my skills to full large scale projects. There is a lot to learn and I still feel like I am drinking from a fire hose most of the time, but I expected that.

I guess at then end of the day. I just want to have my family with me. I feel like I am missing 2/3rds of myself.

Here's to someone buying my house in Iowa. Funny thing is, they wont realize that they bought me a present when buying my house. They will bring my family back together again.